New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
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