Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Congratulations! We have a period
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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