Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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