Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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