Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
did i just pee glitter
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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