so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize