yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Randomize
