Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
