hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize