absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Randomize
