We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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