Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
