hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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