I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
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