Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
