I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
