I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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