he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
