dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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