i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
