I feel great
I just peed on a car
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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