its not stalking. its research.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
