The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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