Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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