my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize