where does the pee come out of this thing
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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