You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
i came on her dog
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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