carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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