Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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