I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize