Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Randomize
