btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
do herpes really smell.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
