i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
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the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
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YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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