Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
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