My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize
