We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
