So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Just pee around me
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
