Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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