My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
