Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
