Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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