hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
