Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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