:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
