Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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