It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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