If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
