My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
