i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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