So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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