Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
